The short novel which I read today was "Father Sergius." This is story about Prince Stepan Kasatsky. He is very purposeful, smart, handsome young man who has all chances to become a great general. However, after his beloved bride tells him that she was a lover of Tsar Nicolas I, Kasatsky instantly severs relationships with her, removes from the world, and becomes a monk. He is given a new name - Father Sergius - and new title of hermit. Sergius becomes famous primarily as healer and crowds of people start to visit his cell. Decades go by. One day a young gorgeous lady seeks for Sergius to heal her from weak-mindedness, but he beds her instead. The next morning, he becomes deeply disappointed because of what he did, losses his faith in God, and seeks to commit suicide. However, an angel appears to Sergius in a dream and commands him to take a journey to a friend of his whom he didn't see for 30 years. There he finds all the truth and becomes a new person. But what did his friend tell him?
His friend is a poor old lady named Pashenka. She also is somewhat weak-headed. In her teens she fell in love and married but unsuccessfully. Her husband wasted all their money and died. She was left as a widow with her children. By the time when Sergius visits him, Pashenka nurses her five grandchildren and son-in-law who suffers from neurasthenia. She earns some money by giving music lessons to her pupils. When father Sergius asks Pashenka how often she prays and visits church, she answers she does it very rare. Suddenly, Sergius understands that with all of his humbleness he praises not God but only his pride. He shows himself and others how holy is he. On the contrary, Pashenka is a different kind of person. She didn't pray for hours, didn't attend any church activities, but she lived for others and this was a true worship.
"The less importance he attached to the opinion of men the more did he feel the presence of God within him"
This made me to hesitate. Monk's lifestyle attracted me with its dependence and total dedication. In monasteries people can focus on themselves, study scriptures and run away from lusts. It seems like a perfect place to live for me, romantic devotee. From Christian point of view, there's no more joy rather than to pray for hours to God who created me and work with my hands. Monk's schedule looks simple, constant, and calm. However, Leo Tolstoy wanted to show in his short novel that such a lifestyle is just a covered egoism. It doesn't praise God, nor does it fulfill person's life purpose. A true worship is to be with people and minister to them. Just like Jesus did.
