Psychology of Conversation

   
      Have you noticed that when you are expressing your opinion, your interlocutor sometimes takes another view even though he doesn't really adhere to it? A similar situation could have happened to us,

                              [someone else] "I think this is awful!"
                              [you]                "Well, it might be not as bad as you think."
                              After sometime.
                              [you]                "Oh, that's horrible!"
                              [someone else] "Let's look at it from a different angle..."

     There's some kind of a mechanism deep down in our psychology that motivates us to do that. Maybe it's an inner feeling to continue the conversation? To do that people must take the opposite sides, so there  would be something to talk about.
      A wise person will use this phenomenon to his advantage. We can notice it during conversations with our relatives and friends. It may help us to distinguish between their true opinion from the opinion they were obliged to take. We can watch after ourselves, so that we would not take the position we actually oppose. And, we can make another person to do what we want by motivating him to take the position we want.
      Let's consider another case:

                              [you]                "Why am I such a looser!?"
                              [someone else] "Dude, you are awesome! What are you talking about?"
                              After sometime.
                              [you]                "See how cool I am?"
                              [someone else] "Don't be so silly! It's only a half-truth."

     In the conversation, we are trying to strike a balance. It looks nasty for us when a person tries to magnify himself. We have an immediate desire to pull this person down. Also, we don't like to see a someone with low self-esteem. It looks like a balance in the conversation is most important, but that's exactly what makes the conversation unattractive. We have nothing to talk about if we are in agreement on everything and nothing disturbs us. Irony isn't it?
     So, in the conversation we need a conflict, a topic which we can discuss. But, instead of talking about the differences between us, we need to target a solution to a mutual problem. This conversation is going to be productive and leave a positive effect on us.